My Sweetie Turned Me Down
Performer: Frank Crumit
Gus Kahn, Walter Donaldson
Victor, 1925
MP3 1,278K
Frank Crumit (1888-1943) was a prolific performer, at one time boasting an
active repertoire of 10,000 songs. Crumit was born in Jackson, Ohio, where he studied
at Culver Military Academy and ultimately took a degree in electrical engineering
at the University of Ohio in 1910. By 1913 this had led, inevitably, to a career as a
song-and-dance man. His recording career began in 1919, first for Columbia and then Victor.He's perhaps best known for his version of "Abdul Abul Bul Amir," which my mother used to sing, bravely, despite her inability to remember any of the lyrics except "He's Abdul Abul Bul Amir!" Judging from Google hits, he's become posthumously famous for the record "The Gay Caballero," for reasons that won't bear much scrutiny. I'm positive I had a copy of this record in my collection, along with "The Prune Song" (I vividly remember Crumit's voice singing, "No matter how young a prune may be, he's always getting stewed"), but neither has turned up in a search.
"My Sweetie Turned Me Down" is a classic, showbusiness-y comic tune of the twenties. It includes the memorable line, "I'll eat potatoes and I'll get fat," proving that your grandma was doing Atkins before Atkins was a zygote.
There's no use crying, it's over now
There's no use trying to start a row.
Don't be sorry for me,
'Cause really I'm not craving sympathy, gee
If I should die before I wake,
What do I care, what do I care?
My sweetie turned me down.
Nights are long and life is short, but
What do I care, what do I care?
My sweetie turned me down.
There's just one place I can see,
And that's the river for me
And I got no boat and I can't float, but
What do I care, what do I care?
My sweetie turned me down.
I can't be happy, I can't be glad.
I can't have kisses I've always had.
Gee, what good is the park,
When I can't get those kisses in the dark - gee!
Let it rain, let it pour,
What do I care, what do I care?
My sweetie turned me down.
And if it ain't going to rain no more,
What do I care, what do I care?
My sweetie turned me down.
She wanted me to reduce,
I starved for weeks like a goose
Now I'll eat potatoes and I'll get fat 'cause
What do I care, what do I care?
My sweetie turned me down.
Wise men say that the world might end, but
What do I care, what do I care?
My sweetie turned me down.
Got no family, got no friends, but
What do I care, what do I care?
My sweetie turned me down.
While in this terrible rage,
I'm glad that I'm on the stage.
'Cause I'll sing "Mammy" and I'll get shot*
What do I care, what do I care?
My sweetie turned me down.
I don't care, I don't care...
My sweetie turned me down.
*thanks to Fred Wemyss for deciphering this line. If I've got my dates right, The Jazz Singer came out two years after this record. Did somebody actually get shot for singing "Mammy" or was it simply the "Send In the Clowns" of 1925?